Who would have thought in your life that you would become a Carer. It probable never entered your head. Who’d have thought that you would be a parent of a very special child? Is it very different from what we call a “normal” parent?
There is lots of positive aspect in being a Carer but also lots of additional pressures and stresses. In this article I am going to write on dealing with the different appointment that are essential when trying to help your child’s development.
Therapist, school, doctors, hospital appointments, etc. which are all important and must be sorted in the best possible way. However, you are dealing with a new world and it can be daunting as you may sometimes find it very difficult and trying, to get the best for your child. It can also be time consuming and stressful and you may have a battle on your hands for certain services and equipment.
So what do you do?
Some parents end up changing their personality to try and cope. They can go from passive to aggressive and miss the most important aspect which is to be assertive. It may be a good idea to look at your communication style and to ensure it is helping your child get the best supports possible without alienating anyone important.
In my life, I have had many battles to try and secure the best for David, some good and some I wish not to remember. My passion for him overrides everything else and I often get frustrated over the situation, as I only have his interest in mind and in heart. However it can lead to stress in my life and this is not good for anyone, me, David or my family.
So before going into an appointment, take a few deep breaths, remember the people you are dealing with have chosen this profession. Assume they want the best for your child unless they show you otherwise. So prepare yourself for the appointment and ask yourself;
- What do I want out of the appointment?
- What is the easiest and best solution to the problem?
- Write down any questions you have before you attend.
- Always clarify the recommendation that are made to ensure you understand and are comfortable with what is going on.
- Help the professional involved, ask them what you can do to help them, it may only be a phone call.
Another tip is try and take on only one appointment a day? I realise that if you are travelling from outside the city to see a therapist that it’s easier to fit in maybe two appointments, however in my experience, it’s not only “trying” on the child but also on you. Instead make the day somewhat enjoyable by going for lunch afterwards with your child or the park or something a little special to stay in the child’s mind after the appointment, you will enjoy it to.
Take plenty of time to arrive at your appointment so you are not screaming for car park spaces (in the rain) or in case your satnav lets you down!!
My most important tip is try and do something for yourself even if it’s just 20 minutes a day that you enjoy doing and book that time in and do it.
Remember this is your life, your partner, your other children’s life too, and they, as well as you, are just as important, so try and ask friends and family to help you a little.
Now after you read this I want you to email me what you do to ease the stresses in your life and help me pass it onto other fabulous parent like you.
My last question to you is how and why do we find the time and do what we have to do? And the answer is one word and one word only LOVE.
Wishing you the joy of Easter.
Dolores.